Laziness is a Lie

A Solo Episode with Blue Russ

 

This is an unedited transcript:

 

Ah, hello. This one has been marinating in my brain for weeks, which, as you’ll see, is highly appropriate for what I want to share with you today.

Welcome, thank you for tuning in. And let’s talk about laziness.

Laziness, procrastination.

Right? We these are all things that

words that we’ve heard, and taken in a

lot of shame around them.

And I’m here to say that laziness is a lie.

No one is actually lazy. This is a story that’s been made up to put people down.

I recently said that to my daughter, that laziness isn’t a thing. And there is no way that she or anyone else is lazy.

And she asked me to explain. And I, as we were having this great conversation about it, I realized that this is something that could be worth talking about with you.

And this feels like key to unlocking

more and more of this hustle culture, this patriarchy that we live in, right? There’s a lot of terminology and different theories around this. But basically, the things that we take for granted the way that our society functions

is killing us. It’s killing the planet. It’s killing our human bodies, you know, it’s harming.

If not immediately killing, right?

There’s harm in

the way that things are happening right now.

So I want to,

I want to back up and just

share a couple of quotes that I came across recently, that were meant to be motivational.

And maybe you’ve heard something like this before, but strikingly, one of them came from Abraham Lincoln, to tribute it to him anyway. And it says, things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.

Oh, do you have a lot of thoughts about that? I sure do.

Oh, yeah, I mean, it’s baked in. Right, it is baked in. So

at least in the United States, where I’m recording from. And I recognize that the country that I live in has a lot of influence over many other parts of the world. So Abraham Lincoln’s words carry a lot of weight.

And it’s not just him, I came across another one. And I’m not even sure who this person is actually.

Michael bassy Johnson, always like to attribute where I can I don’t I’m not familiar with this person. But he said, Stop sleeping, get to work. You will have much time to sleep when you die.

I don’t know about you. Are you feeling inspired yet?

Oh, my goodness. Okay, so you’ve probably heard some version of that, right? You can, you can get all your best when you die.

And let’s talk about

laziness. Like what does that actually mean? It means like, when we’re not doing something when we’re

just because we don’t want to

write we don’t have a valid excuse for not taking action is really what we’re talking about. When we’re talking about laziness.

It’s this idea that you are resting when you should be working.

Which makes me really curious who benefits from our mindset that we can have a character flaw in which we choose to rest without reason instead of

work

that really puts work as the default.

So if our default state should be working, then no wonder. We have conversations like, where we compare how busy we are. It’s like a badge of honor. How many things did you accomplish today? Are you overwhelmed? Are you missing sleep?

Right? These are all even if we don’t overtly celebrate them.

We definitely aren’t quick to share how much we slept, how much rest we got, how much time we took off from working.

We’re not quick to share those things. might even feel ashamed to admit them. Oof.

Think it’s pretty obvious who benefits from that kind of mindset.

Right? If we think about, and I don’t actually know the origins specifically about laziness.

I think there’s been different variations of this concept over many centuries and locations in the world. But I think about the Industrial Revolution, and how handy this is to get people doing work. That’s unfulfilling. Right? repetitive work, for most of us, not everyone, certainly where there’s a variety of things we enjoy. But for most of us, that repetitive, you come to this place for this time to this time, day after day after day.

Not super nourishing, inspiring, motivating.

I have definitely had heard people say that

the main thing that’s motivating for humans,

who are inclined to be lazy, but what gets us to do things is money.

So I want to just sidetrack for a moment about money.

And, and I honestly, the thing that sticks out the most in my mind was one particular conversation. Oh, my goodness, many, many, many years ago.

I mean, probably 20 years ago, it’s so strange to, to think of how long ago this was, but I was at a an event. And I was having lunch

with a group of people and one person. I was just meeting for the first time. And he said

something about how and I don’t remember so long ago, I don’t remember how it came up. But he said

that people were only motivated by money. He was proposing this idea as though he wasn’t even proposing it. He was just stating it like, this is a thing. And don’t we all agree.

And I said, I don’t think that’s true at all. And he said, Well, if you just look under everything, people might say they’re motivated by this or that. But really, it all comes down to money. If we didn’t have money, people wouldn’t do any work. We wouldn’t do anything productive.

And the irony is, and I pointed this out to him, was that the event that we were attending is a huge camping event, a medieval reenactment event run by the SCA, which is the Society for creative anachronism, if you’re not familiar with that, and anachronism is when something is out of place in time. So, acting as though you live in the Middle Ages in the 21st century is an anachronism.

So here we are, in this temporary village.

I mean a small town really of about 10,000 campers, who have put in time and effort, spent their own money, in fact, to be there to co create this whole experience of living in another era, another time in place, specifically Middle Ages, mostly Europe.

So here we are at this event, and he is claiming that people are unmotivated

by anything but many.

And so we’re I’m looking around and just noticing the structures that people build mind you.

People are only there for two weeks at maximum.

So all this work and effort

to make clothing to make structures to inhabit setting up for food.

Certainly there were food vendors may

money there. But for the most part, people were cooking for one another.

And

there were battles. So people were

had made armor, we’re crafting weapons, spending hours practicing using those weapons.

All volunteer

right, the only people perhaps making some money would have been some food vendors and the campsite that was rented.

But the vast majority of the effort going on was completely unpaid. And in fact, people were investing money in order to do this. So

amazing.

And that’s one example. There are so many examples of the work that we do.

Where we are unpaid.

This is especially true. If you are perceived as female in the world, like we are trained to do a lot of unpaid labor, which is a topic for another time.

All that to say that this busyness isn’t about paid work, necessarily, right. Some of it certainly is. But there’s a lot of

expectation of labor of work of activities that we do that are outside of that.

And then there becomes this shame and this guilt if we get behind, quote, unquote, on things.

And certainly, there are activities that have deadlines that are outside of our own making.

I mean, someone made them up every single one of them.

But they have real impact in our life. So I want to I want to acknowledge that yes, there are things that have consequences if they are not done within a timeframe. That is true.

But I want to really have have us examine invite you to rethink your ideas about procrastination, because here’s what the cycle that’s so common that happens right as

let’s say you have a thing, you need to fold the laundry, I’m just gonna keep it really simple. Okay, there’s all it’s complex. But let’s say it’s time to fold laundry. I don’t feel like doing it. And

I put it off. And I put it off, day after day. There’s laundry sitting there. I’m starting to feel shame, right? It’s sitting there, it’s not getting done. It’s my fault.

I started to identify as lazy, oh, I’m too lazy to put that laundry away. Or maybe in a larger way. I’m just lazy. And here’s evidence of that character flaw that I hold.

Oh,

I don’t know about you. But that is super and motivating. That shame and that guilt and blaming myself.

Having my identity now be that I’m unproductive. In a world that rewards productivity above all else.

That feels terrible. And when we’re feeling terrible, when I’m feeling terrible.

I want to do things even less.

Is that true for you, too? I think most of us that’s true.

So what I propose instead

is that procrastination is part of our process.

What if

procrastination

is a valuable part of the rhythm of life.

Just said the word rhythm and when I think about rhythm, what makes a good rhythm what makes rhythm at all?

Both the noise and the silence.

If it was no all noise all the time would just sound like noise. It wouldn’t have a rhythm.

There’s a pause between my words between my sentences gives what I’m saying some rhythm.

So what if

rest

is as valuable as productivity?

And not because it helps our productivity? Right? There’s lots of studies on we get more sleep than you can think more clearly than you could be more productive. Okay, great. Again, we’re wrapping everything around the productivity. So that

anything that isn’t a part of productivity is wrong and needs justification.

What if we threw that away? And rest was an inherently good thing?

We don’t ask, Why do you breathe? Why do you love?

Why are you productive?

Not as in like, what are you getting done? But like, Why do you think?

But we do ask why rest

one of the things that I have had so many conversations with my clients around, and most of my clients are entrepreneurs, they’re building or growing a business. And they’re putting a lot of effort, time energy thought into that process.

And often, rest gets sacrificed.

And then things become harder.

And as their coach, often I’m reminding them to rest do tend to themselves to take time off to get some space away from their business, even though they love it so much.

And one of the things that comes up often is this idea of earning rest.

So productivity is at the center is the priority. And so you do the things so that then you get the reward of resting.

This reminds me of,

of the quote about you will have much time to sleep when you die.

Oh, there’s no way to get all the things done. There’s just there’d be more things to get done.

So we can just keep putting off rest. If that’s how we do it, we have to earn it to get the things done in order to rest, the rest won’t happen. It won’t come.

So what if rest comes first.

I read recently that

exhaling slows the heart rate calms the nervous system. But inhaling increases the heart rate

excites the body into alertness.

So it’s interesting, right, because we need both, we need both of those things Breathing in breathing out.

And so what I’ve taken to doing is when I want to pause and take an intentional breath, and actually, let’s do this right now, I start with an exhale.

I start with the rest is start with the slow down

before I increase

the energy.

So let’s try this now. So long exhale, whatever you got in your lungs, it might not be much

the nice inhale and then even longer exhale, ticking and just exhale a little longer than last time and try that a few times. Right now just try it out

I noticed for me it helps me to close my eyes. It brings even more awareness rests openness into the breath

Yeah, it feels good so that when I opened my eyes I see things just a little bit differently

sometimes our best motivation is stillness.

Letting Go

resting

for no reason other than

the inherent desire for rest.

Yes, we need rest we can also just desire it That’s enough

Have you ever noticed that when you push yourself to get a task done

it becomes harder

like painful

sometimes you just need a little a little Okay start time. Let me just put on some good tunes and get it started. Right and then it takes off and that that’s another thing but this pushing

when you

Your system just doesn’t, isn’t ready doesn’t want to do it isn’t.

It isn’t time.

It can make it harder. But letting go of that releasing the reins of that.

It’s amazing, then

when you’re inclined to do the thing later, it just goes so quickly. Oh,

that wasn’t so bad. And we can take this, we can read this sometimes. And I’ll say it for myself, like, I can sometimes read that as, oh, I don’t know why I waited so long. I could have just done that earlier. But what if I couldn’t,

not with the same level of ease?

Right? If I, if I absolutely have to do a thing. If there’s an emergency, then of course, like, push, push, push, like, thank goodness, I have that ability. But it’s over used in our world that is overused, and it is wearing us out.

So what if we said no to that, we just stopped accepting that.

Imagine that world. I also want to point out that we are cyclical beings. You’ve heard me talk about the moon, I have previous episodes about how I connect with the rhythm of the moon in terms of my own cycles of energy.

There are seasons, there are anniversaries, there’s a cycle of things that happen. And we can trust that cycle. right in the thick of winter, we know that flowers will bloom again in a few months.

And when it’s hot, oh, my goodness, it has been a hot summer. Here in 2020. Do

we know that it won’t always be 100 degrees Fahrenheit, right? We know that it’s going to it’s maybe hard to imagine in that moment, but there will be snow

again.

So what if we have that same trust in our own cycle?

I don’t want to do this thing right now. But I won’t always feel that way.

I’m really motivated. I’m excited, I’m doing this thing. I won’t always be in this mode.

And I get it. The world has not yet respect to this. And we still have to operate in the reality as it exists now.

So I’m not saying this is an easy invitation. But it can be simple.

Start small like with any great things, they start small.

So I’m curious what is something something small you can do this week, to allow yourself to rest, unapologetically

to delay work without justification.

Gosh, for some of some of us. This is really, really hard, just that even a little thing.

For some of us. This has been a practice and the invitation here is to expand that practice even more.

It’s revolutionary.

I heard someone say recently that rest is resistance. I love it.

Yeah, I really see that resistance against this hustle culture that we swim in every day.

All right, I would like to read a poem that I came across. I just love. It’s by Angela Leung.

And it’s called silence.

Silence. It has a sound a fullness. It’s heavy with sigh of tree and space between breaths. It’s ripe with pause between birdsong and crash of surf.

It’s golden they say but no one tells us it’s addictive

here’s your invitation, my friend

to rest

purely for the sake of resting

on and playfully and say go be lazy.

And let me know how it goes. Thanks for tuning in.

Thanks for listening to a path of her own to

Bay I’d love to connect to be in the loop on upcoming events tips and inspiration please visit WWW dot blue russ.com And subscribe to my mailing list